It’s all a matter of persuasion


It was a cold gloomy day in London. As always the fog would run in peering through the cracks of each street. Mrs.Lovetts pie shop was quiet and dark. Not so much as a single costumer had walked in for about 3 whole weeks. She laid her ghostly white elbows on her counter top letting the wheat get smothered onto them. “ ‘Avent seen a costumer for weeks…” She sang to herself quietly. She walked up to the windows and pushed the curtains to the left a bit just taking a quick peek about the streets. No one


She opened her shop door and heard the small brass bell’s tingle fade as she walked outside. She peered around a few corners and no one was there. She turned around to walk back inside when she was startled. “Oh! Mr.T, gave me a fright you did.” She managed to say in between her pants to regain her sanity. He just stared at her coldly. “Any reason why I ‘avent been ‘aving anyone up in my shop Mrs.Lovett?” He questioned her as he turned to reach for the knob. For some odd reason he looked up and let go. He raised an eyebrow and looked at Mrs.Lovett.


“Wot is it, love?” Mrs.Lovett asked as she laid a hand on his broad shoulder. He winced his shoulder a little and she quickly let her hand down. In front of him was a paper that was posted right beside the door. He grabbed it carefully and handed it to Mrs.Lovett. She stared at him worriedly as she reached for it, taking it from his grip. She peeled open the envelope that was sealed with a red stamp from wax.

Dear Mrs.Lovett of 187 Fleet Street. To my concern your bake house needs to be inspected on account of the foul smell it produces at night. We have informed the people of London to be aware of this also. Please prepare for our visit in a matter of 3 weeks where I shall come and inspect your pie emporium as well.

Sincerely, Constable Ichabod Crane of New York.


Sweeney was getting tired of waiting for her. “Well…” He asked rudely, “Whats this all about.” She looked up at him. “I’m going to be inspected.” Sweeney stood there looking down at her. “Well…good luck.” He said as his walked up the steps leading to his shop.
“Wait Mr.T you ‘ave ta help me!” She pleaded as she followed him. “And ‘ow can I possibly help you?” He asked as he leaned on the window looking out into the far sides of London. She paused and stood beside him. “Persuasion? You could persuade the man to get a ‘shave’.” She said as she leaned her face closer to him. He groaned and moved away from her sitting in his barber’s chair. “Mrs.Lovett constables aren’t stupid. They wont fall for my so you say ‘persuasion’.” She pursed her lips. Suddenly she heard a knock emerge from her shop. “Best you be getting that.” Sweeney said as he rubbed a white cloth on one of his ‘friends’.

~~~~~

Mrs.Lovett fixed her hair and pushed down her dress a bit. She turned to find a young man standing outside of the door taking a few notes. “Mrs.Lovett I presume.” He said shakily. “Yes, ‘ow are yea, dear?” She asked as she unlocked the shops door. “Surprisingly well. Im Constable Ichabod Crane.” Mrs.Lovett raised an eyebrow at him. He was sort of jumpy and he stuttered a bit but it wasn’t really noticeable. “You afraid o’ something?” She asked as she unlocked the door. “Nothing at all ma’am.” He replied as he cleared his throat.


“Well there’s my bake’ouse down there if yea care to take a look.” She grinned at him slightly, and as he was about to take his first step down there she took hold of his shoulder. He jumped a bit and turned towards her. “Oh Mr. Crane, you seem to have a bit o’stubble on yea, love. Me friend Mr.Todd can help yea with that.” Her grin was still plastered on her face; she could feel it grow, as Ichabod hesitated. “Miss with all due respect im not interested in getting….a shave.” Suddenly her grin wiped away causing him to step back a little and swallow a lump in his throat. “Now now love, I think yea should I mean…” She hesitated for a moment. “…My daughter….Joannah is down there and she’s a real pretty girl, I think you a gentleman of your standards would be quite nervous around ‘er now knowing that you wouldn’t be looking your best.” He yet again hesitated. “Alright I will get a shave, wait ‘ere and ill be back in moments time.” He said as he made his way out of the shop. “Oh I guarantee that ill be seeing you down in the bake ‘ouse soon.”

~~~

Ichabod entered the shop and jumped as the bell on the door, tingled with sound. “Mr.….Todd I presume?” He said as he took a seat in the barber’s chair. Sweeney stepped away from the window and looked down at the man curiously. “And you are?” “Constable Ichabod Crane. I was checking your landlord’s bake’ouse and she suggested that I come ta see you first.” Sweeney’s lips flinched a bit as he went to grab one of his razors.


“By the way sir, ‘ow much will this be, you see im in a hurry so-” “It’ll be no cost; you seem like a nice man.” He noticed that Ichabods leg started to shake. Staring at it questionably he asked, “A bit jumpy sir?” “Wot?” “Oh nothing sir.” He said as he began the lather him up. He went over to the front of Ichabod. “So, do yea like meat pies?” Sweeney asked him just to get a conversation going. “Yes, I think they are amazing.” Sweeney didn’t ask anything else…in a matter or 14 seconds he finally said, “Any last regrets?” Ichabod opened his eyes, “I beg your pardon?” Sweeney grinned. “Its amazing…how persuasion can sometimes kill you.” And within a heartbeat his blade cut through Ichabods throat, letting the blood drip down his shirt, and squirt onto Sweeney’s vest. He smiled slightly as he stepped on the pedal on the bottom left of the seat which sent Ichabod flying down the shoot.
~~

Mrs.Lovett walked slowly up to the body that was now lying on the cold floor in her bake house. “It’s a shame ‘ow someone so handsome just ‘ad to be put away with.” She lifted up his head and saw that some skin was missing. “Wow, must ‘ave been a ‘ard fall.” She dragged the body towards a table and set it on there. Sweeney entered the room and looked over her shoulder. “Mrs.Lovett…” He said. “Yes, love?” “And just exactly ‘ow did you get ‘im to come up to my shop?” He questioned raising an eyebrow. She chuckled. “Persuasion.”